Due to being a working-out-of-the-home mom of 4 (almost 5!) kids, I often get questions like “How do you get everything done?” and “How do you do it?”. I find it ironic since often the women who are asking me these things have multiple kids themselves. I always think, “Well, the same way you did it!” Through my 14+ years of motherhood, I have learned that different methods of household management work best for different mom personality types. What works well for one parent might not work well for another. If you are feeling overwhelmed, chaotic, or disorganized, you should take the first step of discerning your own personality type and what type of management style will most bring you and your family peace and contentment. 

I happen to be what I call an A++ type of personality. I am hyper organized, structured, and scheduled…often to a fault. Having a personality like mine can cause a lot of stress and anxiety when living with a husband, four kids, two dogs, and 40 chickens – sometimes life throws curve balls in rapid succession, and people with my tendencies have a difficult time rerouting from our original plan or schedule. This is something I have worked hard on in my years of marriage and parenthood, and it has brought me so much peace to be accepting of when situations go off-kilter. There are some tips and tricks I have adopted over the years to try to keep the chaos at a minimum, and I thought I would share them for anyone looking for some ideas or input. 

Morning Routine 

I have found over the years that I enjoy getting up early in the mornings, getting organized, and enjoying the quiet of our home before everyone else begins stirring. I use this time to enjoy a cup of coffee or tea, pray or read Scripture, put away dishes, prep anything I need for supper, and feed the dogs. I feel better about the day when I can have the household in order right away and do a few things I enjoy first thing. Once my husband and kids start waking up, I am prepared to assist with their needs for the morning. Now, not everyone is a morning person who enjoys the early side of the day, so you need to decide how you function most efficiently. 

Nighttime Routine 

These days I enjoy being in bed relatively early, by 9:30 pm, whenever possible. Once supper is over in the evenings, we all work on any chores inside and outside, get the kitchen and house back in order, and begin bedtime routines. It brings me a lot of peace to have my house (especially the kitchen!) picked up and organized in the evening and ready for the next day. If supper is something with many ingredients and steps, or something I need to put in the slow cooker in the morning, I get the ingredients and tools set out and ready, and make sure the protein is in the fridge to thaw. Something else that helps streamline the mornings is getting clothes set out for myself and our toddler, packing my lunch and snacks for work, and making sure the kids have their backpacks and anything else they need for the next day ready to go before they go to sleep. Once the kids are tucked into bed, I head to mine to do some reading, relaxing, and chatting with my husband. 

Managing Housework 

Ah, housework with many people in a household. The cleaning. The laundry. The dishes. The meal planning. It is so easy to get overwhelmed and fall behind. I have been fortunate to not work full-time since having kids, and I have always had one day off during the week. This schedule works well for my family and me – just that one extra day makes such a big difference!  

Laundry is something I try to stay on top of throughout the week, whenever there is a full load to run, we just get it going. I have been teaching my three oldest children how to manage laundry since they were about 10 years old, so I have lots of help with that. My daughter likes to fold laundry and will deliver it to the rooms that it goes to, so that is often one of her chores; the older kids are required to do the laundry in their own hampers once a week or whenever they get full. Our school has a four-day school week, and I work at our church and school, so I get to be on the same schedule as the kids. Fridays are our big housework days, so on Thursday nights I make a chore list for the kids and I to accomplish. I like to get done as much as possible, so our weekends are free when my husband is off work. We can then do fun things or bigger projects he needs to direct. This has made our weekends so enjoyable, and provides a nice house reset each week. If you cannot pick one day to accomplish the bulk of your work, consider picking one thing to accomplish each weekday evening so you can enjoy your weekends together! 

Guarding Your Time 

Over the years I have learned to set boundaries of availability when it comes to my job. This is probably even trickier when you work from home, as there is little physical separation. These days, with work from home set ups, cell phones, emails, and everything in between, it is very easy to contact a person no matter the day or time. It is so important to structure your days into “work time” and “family time”, or whatever other priorities you currently have. Working for our church I ran into struggles with this as parishioners, co-workers, and clergy all have my cell phone number, know where I live, and know all my extended family. I would get stopped in the grocery store for work-related questions, field phone calls at Little League practices, and get calls and texts on Friday evenings. I finally had to tell everyone that I need to only be contacted during my office hours and that I would not be answering messages and emails outside of those. Sometimes I will go beyond that when I have some free time at home or extra work to do, but these boundaries are something I really work to keep up. Giving my full attention to my husband and children when at home is very important to me and crucial for our family dynamic. Plus, while I love my job and work, I love spending time with my family, even when we are just relaxing at home. 

Joy of Motherhood 

No matter if you work outside of the home, work from home, or are a mom who supports her family by caring for the house and children full time, motherhood comes with its joys and its struggles. Make it a priority to discern and understand your personality type and traits and those of your spouse and children, then use that information to form structures and schedules that will best suit your household. Some will be very streamlined and organized, others will be flexible and looser. Neither is right or wrong, the best method just depends on the dynamic of the family members. Mostly, just enjoy each other, don’t stress, and remember that family and village life isn’t meant to be perfectly scheduled, clean, and running completely smooth 100% of the time. Motherhood is a gift, and as they say, the days are long, but the years are short – find the best way for you to enjoy them!